Battle tactics

My fast was a washout.

I have been reading a book about fasting. I want to supercharge my prayer time with fasting. (And ask for healing from autoimmune issues and GI stuff.)

I just said

My first try at fasting was a washout.


I have decided to reframe that thought and learn some things:

  1. I need to start slow. Not try to show off.
    6 hours…8 hours…12 hours…24 hours…not hearing anything about after that: I think the Holy Spirit is preparing for a big battle with a 21 day fast. #Goliath
  2. I need to avoid computer games and social media during my time of seeking God for stuff.
  3. Accountability. I won’t fast alone next time.
  4. Holy Spirit directed. I will make sure to check ✔️ with God about what I’m doing. (I did that last time, but not the other three things.)
  5. Agree upon and write down when my fast ends and what were praying for with my team #focused
Photo by Anna Tarazevich on Pexels.com

“NEEDTOBREATHE – “LET’S STAY HOME TONIGHT” [Live From Celebrating Out of Body]” on YouTube

I was just thinking about something with Jesus.

Hubby and I have friction over whether to go out or stay home quite a bit.

Bring it on!

We have regular dates

1. once a week for conflict resolution

2. and once a week for fun.

And he will often say he wants to stay home.

While I have been home all the time and want to get out of my sickbed and see something beside my walls.

Deflated

This song came to my mind as I was pondering……so I looked it up on YouTube and was listening to it again prayerfully with God.

I suddenly saw that this– our home– is my husband’s Oasis.

he’s safe here.

He can rest and relax and let his hair down in respite.

Of course he would not want to leave it!

It’s sweet that he wants me to be in it with him.

I think instead of being resentful at him and thinking he wants me to be constricted and limited,

I will reframe it reboot my heart

and find it endearing

that he wants to be safe at home with me.

We still need to compromise maybe every other time we can go out or something. I need that.

But

it helps me to understand where he’s coming from you know?

#resentfultograteful

#loveunderstandsme

#soulmates

Strong or just loud?

🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅

“I have both the violent turbulence of the storm and the quiet promises of God in the storm. And what I must work to remember is that something is not necessarily stronger simply because it’s louder.” Craig D. Lounsbrough

🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅🌷🌅


Self control by Mama Joyce

Yeah Mama Joyce! Just what I needed today!

I am a passionate person. Choleric\melancholy. This strength\sensitivity stood me in good stead when I was younger and fighting to leave my abuse and crime ridden family.

But now…well I’m learning new skills. Some things are starting to bite me in the tush, you know?

Like my over-eating….I’m not stuffing my horrible feelings anymore. It’s safe to feel now.

Like my outspokenness….I’m not forced to be quiet about evil stuff anymore…it’s safe to talk.

Like my self-centered ways….I’m not alone anymore. I have a family who needs my cooperative input now.

It’s time to make my passionate feelings mind
the grown-up, spirit filled me.

Photo by Oleg Magni on Pexels.com

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Manage Your Emotions
We all have emotions, but we must learn to manage them. Emotions can be positive or negative. They can make us feel wonderful or awful. They are a central part of being human, and that is fine.

Unfortunately, most people

do what they feel like doing,

say what they feel like saying,

buy what they feel like buying,

eat what they feel like eating.

“And that is not fine, because feelings are not wisdom.



Feelings are fickle; they change frequently and without notification. Since feelings are unreliable, we must not direct our lives according to how we feel. You can be aware of your feelings and acknowledge their legitimacy without necessarily acting on them.

God has given us wisdom, and we should walk in it, not our emotions.

Healthy emotions are very important. They help us recognize how we truly feel and what we value. Good emotional health is vital for a good life. But a good life also means being able to manage our emotions and not be managed by them.

Joyce Meyer. Youversion devotional “Trusting God Day by Day”

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Youversion nails it 💕

Have mercy on me for in You I take refuge.*** I will take refuge in the shadow of Your wings *** until the disaster has passed. Ps 57:1

It may take us a while to get to the other side; some of our plans and dreams may be on hold for a short while. We may have to cut back a bit and make some changes.

At the same time, we wait, but rest assured the prophetic Word God gave you before this storm still stands firm in heaven, and it will manifest in this earth if you stand firm on his Word.

As we …pick up the broken pieces and rise out of the ashes, keeping our eyes on Jesus, knowing he is with us, we can stand in his authority.

This principality will fall, and the purpose you were called to will manifest—hold on to His Word because you will make it to the other side!

Youversion devo “Purpose in the Storm” for today

Living with regret

All I ever wanted in the natural was to be a good parent.
I’ve never loved 

or wanted to do good 

like 

when I held my babies for the first time.

and It’s what I have failed the worst at.

Jesus you be my reason.  Be all my reasons.

Let my blog help other parents who hurt and regret. #12thstepwisdom

I give YOU my crushing, heavy grief and shame.

Forgive me.
Cleanse me.

🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷


🙏🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷🙏🌷

If You don’t help me, I’m toast.

Amen.

Push comes to shove 🌷

I have an opportunity to help at my church as a chat host.  I said I would pray and ask my husband.

 ( Hubby and I ask each other if we’re gonna do big or expensive stuff. we talk it out.)

 (But if we can’t agree, someone gets the final word.  It’s him.)

I asked him: 

he said absolutely not.

Screeching brakes.  Shattering glass.  Smell of burnt rubber.

I

 don’t

 want to

 accept that!


(I didn’t say that outloud. But I felt like it!)
People: I feel like I’m keeping my 

foot on the break in my life,

 with my hopes and dreams—-

 for EVER 

on a hill 

in SAN FRANCISCO! (Infamously hilly town)

There’s even a little annoying voice in my head that says,  “your man is too timid.  He’s holding you back, J.   Don’t listen to him.

  Go do what you want anyway.

  You know you can overwhelm his natural reticence and caution 

by the sheer force of your personality.”

Yep. I do.  I’ve done it before.  

Not a pretty picture.  Don’t ask.


Help.  Jesus.  Help.

I feel like Eve:  “Be like God, girl!”.

 Be your own woman.  Go for it. 
 Move ahead of Mr. StodgyandTimid and into your destiny!”

Yikes.

Just yikes.

 

More later.  🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

The Patriot.

God.

You are obviously more into freedom than the most red-blooded patriot who ever lived.  Look what You paid to preserve that power for everyone.

Thank You for this wonderful, terrible, powerful gift.

Thank You for offering healing to me for the times other people have hurt me with their freedom.

Thank You for all the brave folks who have sacrificed to protect freedom for me and my children.

Help me to bless and not curse people with my freedom.

I ask this in the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth God come in the flesh..

–Mama Jenn

Suicidal thoughts


I claim this promise.  I am part of a spiritual Israel!  A new heritage. crafted in to the vine of Abrahams destiny because I am in Jesus Christ.

 where is that passage?  Oh. 2 Corinthians.

It is a spiritual reality.

 All the promises of God are yes and amen In Jesus, right?

​This was a very timely word for me.

 I have been struggling with suicidal thoughts.  

Part of my illness.  

 Brain damage from exposure to toxic chemicals.  

I believe that is what autoimmune disorders are: the immune system simply gets overwhelmed with all the chemicals of our modern lifestyles and goes haywire.

I am just not able to do anything!  Stuck in bed! And my thoughts prey upon me.

 Except I can pray.

 I need a word from God.

I have believed this lie: That it doesn’t affect change when I pray.

It’s hard for me to believe in stuff I can’t see.

 God change us. 

Give us faith. 

 Heal our thinking 

Renew our Courage and tell us again:

I matter.  I have a destiny.  I am NOT forgotten. 🙏